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IS PRIME MINISTER GORDON BROWN A WEREWOLF? NEW BOOK CLAIMS PREMIER RIPPED OUT THROATS OF DOWNING STREET STAFF DURING LYCANTHROPIC RAGES! CABINET COLLEAGUES FEAR FULL MOON AFTER TERRIFIED CHANCELLOR CHASED TO DOORS OF TREASURY!
IS BRITAIN UNDER THREAT FROM GIANT FISH? LEADING CONSPIRACY THEORIST CLAIMS RECENT COASTAL FLOODING RESULT OF COLOSSAL HALIBUT ATTACK! ALLEGES CLIMATE CHANGE, FOOT AND MOUTH AND SWINE FLU PART OF GOVERNMENT COVER UP OF MASS REVOLT BY BRITAIN'S ANIMALS!
FRANKENSTEIN MONSTER ARRESTED AS NOTED MAD SCIENTIST ATTEMPTS TO MOVE ON GYPSYS CAMPED ILLEGALLY IN CASTLE GROUNDS!
DID YEARS OF IMPERSONATING SUPERNATURAL CREATURES TURN MONSTER MAKER INTO PERVERT? WORLD OF CRYPTOZOOLOGY SHAKEN TO ITS FOUNDATIONS BY ALLEGATIONS THAT MOST OF BRITAIN'S TOP PARANORMAL PHENOMENA CREATED AS TOURIST ATTRACTIONS!
HOW ARE A SERIES OF APPARENTLY UNMOTIVATED ATTACKS ON CONJURERS CONNECTED WITH A SINISTER POLITICAL CONSPIRACY AND A TOP SECRET GOVERNMENT PROJECT? WHY ARE SOME WORLD LEADERS CALLING FOR A BAN ON MIND READERS?
TOWN CENTRE BURNS AS GIANT IMAGE OF SANTA SEEN SHIMMERING OVERHEAD! WAS CHRISTMAS SHOPPING RIOT TRIGGERED BY DISCOVERY OF ALIEN ARTEFACT? INCREDIBLE CLAIMS THAT FESTIVE SEASON ORIGINALLY RESULT OF ALIEN INTERVENTION!
WAS THE 'ALIEN VISITOR' THAT TERRORISED SLEEPY ENGLISH VILLAGE REALLY A HUMAN PEEPING TOM? SEX OFFENDER'S CLAIMS SPARK FURIOUS DEBATE IN WORLD OF UFOLOGY!
TOP CRYPTOZOOLOGIST CLAIMS ESCAPED WILD ANIMALS ARE BEHIND SERIES OF MYSTERIOUS DEATHS AND DISAPPEARANCES! ARE WILD HIPPOS AND ELEPHANTS RUNNING AMOK IN ENGLISH COUNTRYSIDE?
TOP ANTHROPOLOGIST CLAIMS PRIMITIVE TRIBE IS LIVING UNDETECTED IN HEART OF BRITAIN'S CAPITAL CITY! AMAZING THEORY BACKED BY LONDONER'S CLAIMS TO HAVE BEEN HELD CAPTIVE FOR YEAR BY SAVAGES IN TOOTING!
DOES A SPECTRAL SEX FIEND STALK THE STALLS OF FULCHESTER CATHEDRAL? A CHILLING SEASONAL TALE OF TERROR!
ARE HOMOSEXUAL NAZIS FROM THE HOLLOW EARTH PLANNING WORLD DOMINATION? TOP CONSPIRACY THEORIST REVEALS GAY NAZI GENERALS' PLOT TO 'TURN' HITLER!
HALLOWEEN HORRORS AS TABLES TURNED ON TRICK-OR-TREATERS! WOLFMAN AND FRANKENSTEIN'S MONSTER TERRORISE TOWN WITH PUMPKIN ATTACKS AS VICTIM PUTS FRIGHTENERS ON TORMENTORS!
RUMOURS OF GIANT OCTOPUS ATTACK ON EAST COAST WIPES MILLIONS OF DOLLARS OFF OF SHARE PRICES! FINANCIAL SECTOR DENIES MAKING DECISIONS BASED ON IRRATIONAL FEARS!
TONY BLAIR SET FOR SHOCK RETURN TO GOVERNMENT AS WITCHFINDER GENERAL! BROWN ACCUSES OPPOSITION OF BLACK MAGIC CONSPIRACY AS BANKS FALL VICTIM TO VOODOO ECONOMICS!
WAS PAUL McCARTNEY REPLACED BY DOUBLE IN 1966? DID JOHN LENNON FAKE OWN DEATH? DID THEY FORM BEATLES TRIBUTE BAND? MUSIC WORLD STUNNED BY INCREDIBLE CLAIMS!
LAST GREAT STORY OF WORLD WAR TWO REVEALED AS NAZI PLOT TO BRING BRITAIN TO ITS KNEES WITH ARMY OF INFLATABLE EXPLODING WOMEN UNCOVERED!
ALIENS GIVE CHILLING WARNING TO MANKIND! IS IT HUMANITY'S FATE TO BE SPANKED INTO SUBMISSION BY SPACEMEN? PROMISE OF PROPER DISCIPLINE WELCOMED IN MANY QUARTERS!
MAN BELIEVES LIFE ONLY VALIDATED WHEN CAUGHT ON CAMERA, USES SURVEILLANCE TECHNOLOGY TO STAR IN FILM OF OWN LIFE!
BREAST GROPINGS REVEAL EVIL CONSPIRACY TO REPLACE TOP CELEBRITIES WITH DOUBLES! DOPPLEGANGERS EXPOSED BY TELL-TALE LACK OF NIPPLES!
WAS 9/11 AN ILLUSION MASTERMINDED BY TOP CONJURER DAVID COPPERFIELD? HAS BIN LADEN BROKEN THE MAGICIANS' CODE? EXPERTS WARN OF DIRE CONSEQUENCES!
MAN WAGES OWN PRIVATE WAR ON CHRISTMAS IN SUBURBAN STREET! WIFE CLAIMS HUSBAND DRIVEN MAD BY NEIGHBOURS' VULGAR FESTIVE DECORATIONS!
DID FAMED PSYCHIC URI GELLAR USE POSSESSED WASHING MACHINE TO STALK FEMALE NEIGHBOUR? CLAIMS THAT MENTALIST'S POWERS CREATED SEXUAL MAYHEM IN SUBURBAN STREET!
ARE SUICIDE TRICK-OR-TREATERS SET TO SPREAD TERROR THIS HALLOWEEN? POLICE SHOOT SUICIDE BOMBER COSTUMED CHILDREN IN MISTAKE FOR CRAZY ISLAMIC EXTREMISTS!
IS TRUE LOVE ACROSS THE GREAT DIVIDE OF LIFE AND DEATH POSSIBLE? TOP TV MEDIUM TELLS OF HER SUPERNATURAL SEXUAL SHENANIGANS!
ARE UK RADIO STATIONS FORCING LISTENERS TO COMMIT SEXUAL OFFENCES? WRAPPING GENITALS IN TIN FOIL ONLY WAY TO DEFLECT PERVERTED RADIO WAVES!
DO EROTIC CROP CIRCLES HOLD KEY TO CURING PREMATURE EJACULATION? ARE ALIEN SEX THERAPISTS ABDUCTING SEXUALLY DYSFUNCTIONAL FOR TREATMENT?
ARE CONSPIRACY THEORIES JUST A GOVERNMENT INSPIRED SMOKESCREEN TO DIVERT ATTENTION AWAY FROM THE REAL TRUTH?
HAS FORMER BEATLE BEEN RESPONSIBLE FOR SERIES OF SHOWBIZ DEATHS IN ORDER TO KEEP DIABOLICAL DEAL?
TAKEN FROM BEHIND BY SATAN! BRITAIN'S TOP OCCULTIST TELLS OF DESPERATE BATTLE TO SAVE POSSESSED SOUL IN NIGHTCLUB TOILETS! IS BRIGHTON IN GRIP OF SATANIC CONSPIRACY?
FESTIVE FEAR AS BRITAIN'S CHRISTMAS TREES TURN BODY SNATCHERS! THREAT OF CHRISTMAS EVERY DAY AS SEASONALLY-OBSESSED REPLICANTS TAKE OVER!
THE DEAD ARE RISING FROM THEIR GRAVES - TO VOTE TORY! CONSERVATIVE LEADER DAVID CAMERON'S SINISTER NEW STRATEGY TO FLOOD POLLS WITH LIVING DEAD VOTERS REVEALED!
PHANTOMS FLEE TOP TV GHOST HUNTER'S MONSTROUS ENCHANTED ERECTIONS! DOES SPIRIT OF DEAD PORN STAR GUIDE EXORCIST'S HANDS AS HE WHACKS OFF IN FACE OF FEAR?
DID THE REAL PAUL McCARTNEY DIE IN 1966 CAR CRASH? GHOST OF GEORGE HARRISON REVEALS AMAZING TRUTH BEHIND MYSTERY!
CALLS FOR EXHIBITION BAN AS ARTIST'S GIANT CELEBRITY GENITALIA SCULPTURES RUN AMOK! PANIC AS OUTSIZE INFLATABLE PENIS DEMOLISHES TOWN!
IS FORMER PRESIDENT CLINTON ACTUALLY A PORN-POWERED ALIEN ROBOT? BRITISH COMPUTER HACKER UNCOVERS SECRETS OF PROJECT PORNUCOPIA!
BRITISH GOVERNMENT TOTALLY UNPREPARED FOR MONSTER ATTACKS! MASSIVE OFFICIAL COVER-UPS TO CONCEAL EXTENT OF MONSTER RAMPAGES IN UK!
TOP POLICEMAN WARNS OF IMMINENT MUMMY ATTACKS ON BRITAIN! PRIME MINISTER ORDERS DETENTION OF ALL FEZ WEARING FOREIGNERS TO COMBAT 'CREDIBLE NEW TERROR THREAT'!
IS SANTA A NAZI WAR CRIMINAL? THIRD REICH LINKS SURFACE AS FASCIST FATHER XMAS WAGES REIGN OF RACIST TERROR IN NORTH LONDON!
NEW DOCUMENTARY EXPOSES BRITAIN'S SUBURBAN CANNIBALS! HUMAN FLESH ON THE MENU FROM HAMPSTEAD DINNER PARTIES TO TEN DOWNING STREET!
YOUNG WOMEN LEFT HAIRLESS AND SHINY AS CRAZED FIEND ABDUCTS AND WAXES VICTIMS! TRAGIC WAXING ACCIDENT TURNS TOP BEAUTICIAN INTO NOCTURNAL PUBE-PURLOINING MONSTER!
OCCULTIST'S POSSESSED TOILET TERRORISES HOTEL - FOUL ODOURS AND THINGS THAT GO SPLASH IN THE NIGHT DRIVE OUT GUESTS AND TRAUMATISE STAFF!
ARE ALIEN NATURISTS TO BLAME FOR NUDE RIOTS SWEEPING BRITAIN? CONTACTEES TELL OF MEN IN BLACK PREACHING 'PEACE THROUGH NUDITY'!
BLAIR PERFORMS WHITE HOUSE EXORCISM ON DUBYA! BUSH POSSESSED BY NIXON'S EVIL SPIRIT AS SEANCE TO SUMMON PAST PRESIDENTS FOR POLICY ADVICE GOES AWRY!
DID ANCIENT ASTRONAUTS STOP OFF ON EARTH FOR A DUMP? IS STONEHENGE AN ALIEN CRAPPER? DEFECATORY ORIGINS OF HUMAN CIVILISATION REVEALED!
BRITAIN'S TOP VAMPIRE HUNTER RESCUES INNOCENT GIRL FROM VAMPIRIC CLUTCHES OF UNDEAD PRINCESS DI! BRANDED GRAVE-ROBBING CHARLATAN AND SEXUAL PREDATOR BY RIVAL OCCULTIST!
ARE SUPERMARKET CHIEFS EXPLOITING ALIEN TECHNOLOGY TO GAIN COMPETITIVE EDGE OVER RIVALS? IS CRASHED FLYING SAUCER BEING HIDDEN AT SUPERMARKET?
WIFE SWAPPING WITH SERIAL KILLERS! HOMEMADE TORTURE DUNGEONS! ALIENS CRASHING SWINGER'S PARTIES! NEW DOCUMENTARY EXPOSES DARK SECRETS OF BRITISH SUBURBIA!
STARS UNLEASH EVIL SPIRITS AGAINST RIVALS AS VOODOO BECOMES NEW CELEBRITY RELIGION! BLOOD SACRIFICES REPLACE TALENT AS KEY TO SUCCESS!
PANIC SWEEPS BRITAIN AS FURIOUS PENSIONERS GO ON BLOODY RAMPAGE! CULL OF OVER SIXTIES PROPOSED AS YOUTHS ATTACKED BY RABID COFFIN-DODGERS!
PORN-OBSESSED EVIL SPIRIT TERRORISES FAMILY! PARANORMAL EXPERTS BAFFLED AS HOUSE ROCKED BY NOCTURNAL GROANS AND ECTOPLASM SODDEN UNDERWEAR!
PRINCESS DI - PATRON SAINT OF ADULTERY? JOHN LENNON - HALLUCINOGENIC SAVIOUR? ANGLICAN CHURCH PROPOSES CELEBRITY SAINTS FOR POPULIST APPEAL!
CRUCIFIX WIELDING MOB STORM IMMIGRATION CENTRE AS TORY MP ACCUSES ASYLUM SEEKERS OF WITCHCRAFT! UNHOLINESS TEST PROPOSED FOR IMMIGRANTS!
RELIGIOUS SENSATION AS FACE OF CHRIST APPEARS IN TOILET BOWL! PILGRIMS FLOCK TO FRENCH PUBLIC TOILET SEEKING MIRACLE CURES!
NOTORIOUS SERIAL KILLERS RETURN FROM GRAVE FOR MUDEROUS RAMPAGE! SUSSEX MAN FIGHTS UNDEAD CHILD KILLER AND ZOMBIE MASS MURDERER!
AMAZING REAL-LIFE STORIES OF PEOPLE WHOSE LIVES HAVE BEEN CHANGED AFTER BEING SEXUALLY MOLESTED BY ANGELS!
GENTLEMEN BUGGERED IN THE STREET AS MYSTERY ASSAILANT TERRORISES BRITAIN! WHO IS THE PHANTOM BUGGERER - FREEMASON, ROYALTY OR WISHFUL THINKING?
FORMER ROYAL AIDE REVEALS INCREDIBLE SPANKING SECRETS OF FLYING SAUCER VISITORS! IS PRINCE PHILIP 'ONE OF THEM'?
LYNCH MOB ATTACKS FATHER CHRISTMAS AS SANTA EXPOSED AS PAGAN SEX FIEND! CHILDREN INJURED IN GROTTO BOMBING!
APE MAN GOES ON CARNAL RAMPAGE! SECRETS OF PRIMEAVAL SEX REVEALED AS SCIENTISTS REVIVE PALEOLITHIC PERVERT! STONE AGE PORN STASH UNCOVERED IN CAVE!
TRUTH BEHIND PHILIP K DICK'S TERRIFYING VISIONS REVEALED! TOP SCIENCE FICTION WRITER VICTIM OF FASCIST CONSPIRACY LED BY ARCH RIVAL!
OBSCENE PHONE CALLS FROM BEYOND THE GRAVE? WOMAN'S AMAZING THREE-IN-A-BED ROMP WITH FRANKENSTEIN'S MONSTER AND DRACULA!
AMAZING CIA PARANORMAL RESEARCH PROGRAMME REVEALED! PSYCHIC UNCOVERS BIN LADEN'S SORDID SEX SECRETS!
SCIENTISTS - EVIL OR JUST PLAIN MAD? CALLS FOR BAN ON SCIENCE AMID ALLEGATIONS OF GARDEN SHED CRYOGENICS AND SECRET DEALS WITH ALIEN SEX PERVERTS!
POLITICS AND CURRENT AFFAIRS
CRIME AND PUNISHMENT
RELIGION AND ROYALTY
POP CULTURE
SCIENCE
WEIRD
EDITORIAL
SLEAZE DIARY
REVIEWS
SLEAZEBAG
TOTAL BOLLOCKS!
STAFF PROFILES
LINKS
ARCHIVE
HUMORFEED