Was genteel and pseudo-intellectual British TV game show Call My Bluff actually an instrument of government oppression?
Top conspiracy theorist claims show part of establishment conspiracy to subvert English language, thereby redefining the way we view certain issues.
‘Send them home!’ In wake of New Zealand mosque terror shootings, Maori leaders call for European immigrants to go home. Sentiments echoed by Australian Aboriginals and Native Americans as all call for end to mass white immigration. Native Americans propose wall around US to keep out white hordes.
Read MoreInvestigation into Stephen Hawking’s former nurse uncovers underground network of gladiatorial contests for the disabled. Did late physicist’s use of high tech weaponry to win competition lead to Far Eastern gambling syndicate ‘offing’ him?
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As soon as David Lammy used the term ‘White Saviour Syndrome’ with regard to certain Comic Relief celebrities, the reaction was inevitable: the ludicrous allegation that Lammy is being racist for condemning white people trying to capitalise on their charity ‘work’…
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Did the dinosaurs fart themselves into extinction? Top scientist sparks controversy with new theory that Jurassic giants own noxious emissions might have wiped them out by triggering catastrophic climate change.
Read MoreWere Defence Secretary Gavin Williamson’s latest policy initiatives inspired by watching children’s TV? Worst Defence Secretary ever’s plans for moonbase and interceptors to combat future alien threat allegedly ripped off from Gerry Anderson TV shows.
Read MoreIs Jeff Bezos’ penis about to bring down Trump? Amazon boss calls Trump-supporting tabloid’s bluff, daring them to publish illicitly obtained ‘below the belt’ photos of the billionaire. Does ‘smoking wang’ point toward President?
Read MoreFears that post-Brexit toilet paper shortages could lead to civil unrest. Government prepares plans for rationing (two sheets per dump) and martial law, while citizens explore potentially hazardous alternatives including newspaper and scouring pads.
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House of Commons in chaos as Corbyn’s ‘Zombie Government’ comment results in opposition MP firing shotgun at government benches, shouting ‘shoot ’em in the head!’ Rival parliamentary factions ‘tool up’ as Brexit debate turns violent!
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Desperate Theresa May claims Brexit deal rejected by Parliament actually drawn up by ghost of Margaret Thatcher. Prime Minister allegedly possessed by spirit of predecessor determined to pursue her Euroceptic agenda from beyond the grave. Cynical attempt to avert blame for humiliating defeat or inspired attempt to rally right-wing support for deal by accediting it to conservative icon?
Read MorePublic amazement as Home Secretary takes tough line on immigration by personally attacking rubber dinghy and hurling illegal occupants back into sea. New policy initiative or cynical political posturing as Sajid Javid positions himself as Tory tough guy in race to succeed Theresa May?
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We look back at the year past – or would if we could remember any of it. From phantom drones to Brexit turmoil, 2018 is vaguely recalled, but any predictions for 2019 are roundly rejected.
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Top Brexiteer switches sides following visitations from three ghosts with visions of Brexit past, present and future. Spectre of a far from Happy Brexmas with Santa being denied free movement to deliver presents, leads to cabinet minister embracing second referendum and ‘No Brexit at All’.
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Santa’s secret sweat shop exposed! While elves toil in slave conditions on factory floor, Santa lives life of decadence in penthouse, enjoying sex and drug parties!
Read MoreMeet the ‘Brexit Preppers’ as they prepare their ‘Brexit Bunkers’ for the chaos they believe will follow a ‘No Deal’ Brexit. Top ‘Prepper’ tells of how tinned food, medicines, even illegal drugs, European porn and prostitutes are being hoarded in preparation for Brexit. Reveals that he is prepared to defend his bunker by force, if necessary.
Read MoreGovernment proposes replacing ‘Black Friday’ with ‘Black Face Friday’, where you can only ‘bag a bargain’ if your face is covered in boot polish . Supporters believe ‘Black Face Friday’ would better address British traditions of intolerance, bigotry and casual racism than US import ‘Black Friday’.
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