Author: docsleaze

Escape From Taliban

An all-singing, all-dancing extravaganza depicting the events surrounding the attack on the World Trade Centre and its aftermath, this movie represents Bollywood’s take on the War on Terror.

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Code Brown

Jihadist group ISIS have claimed responsibility for the huge turd which recently brought Brussels to a standstill. Belgian authorities declare ‘Code Brown’ as Jihadist ‘Shit to Kill’ tactics hit Metro.

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Hollywood Radicals

Hollywood Stars Declare War on ISIS in Retaliation for Terrorists Continued Failure to Acknowledge their Cultural Significance by Not Attacking Los Angeles. Claim latest Attacks in Paris Have Caused Extreme Trauma to their Egos.

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Breaking the Silence

Queen Accused of Breaking Wind During Two Minute Silence at Cenotaph. Royal Fart Widely Condemned as Disrespectful – Not Mention Noxious – to Britain’s War Dead and Military Veterans.

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Reactionary Bullshit

I make it a rule never to argue with drunks. Not even when I’m drunk myself. But especially not when I’m sober – alcoholic intoxication impairs the ability to reason, which means that it is impossible to engage...

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The Haunted Trousers

Are Man’s Trousers Haunted by Evil Spirit of Sex Offender? Exorcism Performed on Possessed Pantaloons Following Paranormal Phenomena in Groin Area, Including Ectoplasm and Bizarre Bulging!

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Corbyn’s Coven

Is Labour Leader Jeremy Corbyn High Priest of a Powerful Witches’ Coven? Astonishing Claims From Tory Back Bencher Who Alleges that Corbyn Plans to Destroy Britain Through Black Magic.

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Kill the Poor

Does David Cameron’s ‘Assault on Poverty’ Herald the Violent Elimination of Britain’s Poor? Top Anti-Poverty Campaigner Claims Tories Planning Mass Murder of Benefits Claimants in Order to Eliminate Poverty.

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Going Nuclear

Government announces plans to deploy UK’s nuclear deterrent against Islamic extremists with nuclear strike on Birmingham. Migrants and Scots Nationalists also identified as threats to UK security and targeted with nuclear missiles.

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Animal Passions

Following ‘Pig Gate’, more animals come forward to claim sexual abuse at hands of senior Tories. Allegations that high level bestiality ring centered on South London city farm suppressed RSPCA investigations.

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Abbott and Costello Meet Sherlock Holmes

Having finally laid to rest their classic horror monsters by pitching them against Abbott and Costello in a series of cheap B-movies, Universal Pictures, desperate to prop up the dire duo’s film career, turned their attention to another of their best loved franchises – Sherlock Holmes.

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Bad Weather

Is main bidder for BBC weather forecasting contract involved in manipulating weather to fix outcome of sporting events for shady Far Eastern betting syndicates? Amazing claims made by investigative journalist!

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Hate! Hate! Hate!

Hate! Hate! Hate! It’s what fuels Britain’s media, you know. There always has to be someone to hate and loathe. Someone to blame all of your problems on. Someone who, you know, isn’t like us. Because that means...

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Erotic Apocalypse

Experts warn of ‘erotic apocalypse’ if public given access to recently uncovered ancient pornography. UK government seeks to suppress addictive classical smut amid fears that its potency could destroy civilisation.

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The Thrill Seekers

Inspired by Calais refugees, thrill seeking British tourists walking through Channel Tunnel for holidays in France! New craze sees jaded UK tourists sailing to Greek resorts on refugee rafts!

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