Category: Weird

Just what is President Trump’s motivation for declaring that his administration is to release all government files pertaining to aliens and UFOs? Is he hoping files contain details of former Democrat presidents’ sexual liaisons with aliens salacious enough to distract from Epstein files? Or will files reveal Epstein’s involvement in trafficking underage aliens for exotic sex and further incriminate Trump in extraterrestrial sex scandal?

Is a legendary ancient text behind much of the current turmoil in the Middle East? Disturbing claims that terrorists have been employing the sacred art of sex and terror, as laid out in the ‘Hamasutra’. According experts, both Israeli invasion of Gaza and US bombing of Iran have been motivated by attempts to destroy all known copies of the dangerous text which promotes sexual ecstasy through violent terror.

Has Trump administration’s policy of illegally sinking small boats alleged to have been involved in smuggling drugs into US been extended across Atlantic? Alarm at series of apparent US airstrikes on small pleasure boats on UK boating ponds and lakes. Are attacks motivated by need to generate headlines to appease Trump? Fears that UK extremists like Nigel Farage will call on Trump to sink small boats carrying migrants in English Channel.

Paranormal Investigator, Exorcist and Agony Aunt The Reverend Leonard Fanny advises readers on their supernatural problems. This time he looks into a case of ‘Halloween Pumpkin Peril’. Has drunken oral sex with a carved pumpkin resulted in persecution by a pumpkin hurling evil spirit? As victim felled by pumpkin to the groin, the Rev investigates.

Top conspiracy theorist proposes ‘Unified Conspiracy Theory’ which will incorporate and reconcile all other conspiracy theories, explaining them all. Welcomed in some conspiracy circles as way of regulating the conspiracy community and reducing occurrences of ‘rogue’ conspiracies that bring whole community into disrepute, but condemned by others who suspect it is itself an authoritarian conspiracy designed to control the conspiracy narrative and suppress the truth.

Circus overcomes performing animal ban by employing men in animal suits to perform dangerous acts. Panic ensues in quiet English town as fake lions mistaken for real thing by gun-toting pub landlord and local RSPCA inundated with calls from locals outraged by sight of gorillas apparently fighting bears, elephants on tightropes and knife-throwing monkeys.

Has UFOlogy become too sensationalised? Top flying saucer expert claims modern UFO community too professionalised and commercialised, ‘sexing up’ alien encounters with inter-species sex and anal probes to sell their books and DVDs. Calls for return to ‘Golden Age’ of blurred photos and mysterious lights in order to bring back ‘magic’ of flying saucers.

Reform UK candidate laments decline of traditional British witchcraft in the provinces. Claims that he hasn’t been invited to join a single coven or satanic cult since moving to provincial town. Is influx of immigrants to UK with their foreign occult practices like Voodoo driving out traditional British occultism?

Paranormal Investigator, Exorcist and Agony Aunt The Reverend Leonard Fanny advises readers on their supernatural problems. This time he looks into a case of ‘Possession by Download’. Has a laptop become possessed by porn obsessed spirit inadvertently downloaded like a computer virus – a sort of ‘evil-ware’? The Rev investigates.

Paranormal Investigator, Exorcist and Agony Aunt The Reverend Leonard Fanny advises readers on their supernatural problems. This time he looks at the strange case of ‘The Curse of the Insatiable Sex Fiend’. Is a husband’s sudden infidelity with multiple women the result of contact with a cursed mummified penis? The Rev investigates.

Is the amount of human waste floating in Britain’s rivers proof of the existence of giants? Cryptozoologist controversially claims giant humans are using our rivers as sewers, depositing their outsize jobbies in them. Plans to track these elusive creatures by following their gigantic spoor.

Paranormal Investigator, Exorcist and Agony Aunt The Reverend Leonard Fanny advises readers on their supernatural problems. This time he addresses the perplexing case of ‘My Haunted Arse’. Can a person’s posterior be haunted and produce supernatural phenomena including apparitions, disembodied voices and strange sounds? The Rev investigates.

Are a new subterranean underclass emerging from beneath the streets of London’s wealthiest districts? While right-wing commentator claims that strange figures seen in empty millionaire mansions are evidence of ‘immigrants in the walls’, top scientist claims albino beings descendants of domestic staff abandoned and trapped in mansion basements.

Paranormal Investigator, Exorcist and Agony Aunt The Reverend Leonard Fanny advises readers on their supernatural problems. This time he counsels a man accused of perpetrating a ‘Holy Grope’. Spiritual healer or sex offender? Man accused of abusing his healing gifts for sexual gratification.

Sinister shopping cult plans human sacrifice to ensure good bargain hunting at this year’s ‘Black Friday’ sales. Seeking ‘Black Friday’ virgin to be burned to death in giant wicker cash register. Academic speculates that ‘Black Friday’ shopping frenzy is cultural reincarnation of pagan ‘Wild Hunt’.

Town calls for Halloween to be banned after drugged up ‘Trick or Treaters’ go on homicidal rampage after being given hallucinogens disguised as sweets. Further mayhem caused by Suella Braverman-masked teenagers harassing immigrants and asylum seekers with threats of deportation if Halloween treats not forthcoming.