Category: Weird

Paranormal Investigator, Exorcist and Agony Aunt The Reverend Leonard Fanny advises readers on their supernatural problems. This time he addresses the perplexing case of ‘My Haunted Arse’. Can a person’s posterior be haunted and produce supernatural phenomena including apparitions, disembodied voices and strange sounds? The Rev investigates.

Are a new subterranean underclass emerging from beneath the streets of London’s wealthiest districts? While right-wing commentator claims that strange figures seen in empty millionaire mansions are evidence of ‘immigrants in the walls’, top scientist claims albino beings descendants of domestic staff abandoned and trapped in mansion basements.

Paranormal Investigator, Exorcist and Agony Aunt The Reverend Leonard Fanny advises readers on their supernatural problems. This time he counsels a man accused of perpetrating a ‘Holy Grope’. Spiritual healer or sex offender? Man accused of abusing his healing gifts for sexual gratification.

Sinister shopping cult plans human sacrifice to ensure good bargain hunting at this year’s ‘Black Friday’ sales. Seeking ‘Black Friday’ virgin to be burned to death in giant wicker cash register. Academic speculates that ‘Black Friday’ shopping frenzy is cultural reincarnation of pagan ‘Wild Hunt’.

Town calls for Halloween to be banned after drugged up ‘Trick or Treaters’ go on homicidal rampage after being given hallucinogens disguised as sweets. Further mayhem caused by Suella Braverman-masked teenagers harassing immigrants and asylum seekers with threats of deportation if Halloween treats not forthcoming.

Is a phantom flasher terrorising an English town? Are local children being subjected to spectral exposure by a vengeful spirit? As local vigilantes dig up local graveyards in search of deceased sex offender, spirit itself contacts medium to protest innocence of peadophilia in life, claiming post-mortem antics are payback against his former persecutors.

Britain’s top ghost hunter discusses his most mind-boggling cases. From toilet-blocking phantom stools in Trowbridge to the ghostly talking anus of Plymouth and the moaning nun of Minehead, our leading paranormal investigator explains why restless ghosts are moving into our modern, new build, houses.

Are flying saucers the new ‘small boats’ in the fight against illegal immigration to the UK? UFO expert claims spaceships dropping off huge numbers of literal illegal aliens by night in UK. Are creatures from outer space stealing our jobs, benefits and women? Counter claims of secret government deal with aliens to take human illegal immigrants off-world for ‘processing’.

Paranormal Investigator, Exorcist and Agony Aunt The Reverend Leonard Fanny advises readers on their supernatural problems. This time he faces the problem of a man who claims that the sexual outrages, including indecent exposure and bestiality, he is accused of committing are the result of possession by the evil spirit of a sex offender!

Is there a conspiracy to euthanise the world’s billionaires under cover of extreme exploration? Outrage as controversial conspiracy theorist advances bizarre thesis in wake of ‘Titan’ submarine tragedy. Claims that very expensive extreme tourism is actually honey trap designed by shadowy group to lure super wealthy to their deaths.

Should we fear the sexually diverse? Small town US newspaper proprietor launches extraordinary campaign against sexual and gender diversity practices at major US firms. Claims it is part of long term plot by unholy aliens to takeover earth by normalising gay sex, thereby wiping out humanity by halting sexual reproduction.

Paranormal Investigator, Exorcist and Agony Aunt The Reverend Leonard Fanny advises readers on their supernatural problems. This time he finds himself faced with the problem of a man who claims to be sustained entirely by the physical love of multiple women rather than through eating and drinking. Medical miracle or adulterous fraud?

Recent US downing of several so-called UFOs causes consternation in UFO community – lack of subsequent alien invasion and ease of shootings down leaves many calling into question their long-held beliefs about UFOs. Top UFOlogists try to rally followers with ‘false flag’ conspiracy theories as they fear threat to lucrative book sales and TV coverage.

Man arrested after householder injured by Christmas present being farted through letter box claims that he is actually the legendary ‘Farter Christmas’. Alleges he is trying revive tradition of farting down chimneys, having been displaced by bowdlerised, fart free, ‘Father Christmas’ since Victorian era. Forgotten seasonal icon or fart obsessed madman?

Paranormal Investigator, Exorcist and Agony Aunt The Reverend Leonard Fanny advises readers on their supernatural problems. This time he counsels a man suffering from the activities of ‘My Living Sex Dolls’. Is a man’s ability to ejaculate living replicas of the subjects of his masturbatory fantasies Satanically inspired?