Tag: politics

Black and White House

President Donald Trump shocks nation by appearing in black face and performing minstrel songs live from White House. Aides claim President’s actions represent celebration of black American culture and are definitely not racist.

Read More

True Blue Sex Scandal

Top political spin doctor laments lack of good sex scandals during Tory leadership contest. Contends that well-managed and carefully leaked affair can enhance candidate’s standing with male voters who believe sexual prowess and virility translate into political competence and international statesmanship.

Read More

Phoney War

Did President Trump’s German relative play crucial role in Allied victory in World War Two? New book claims General Von Trumpenhoffer advised Fuhrer D Day invasion was ‘Fake News’, ensuring reinforcements not sent. Also told Hitler to build wall to keep out Russians and suggested suing Allies for bomb damage.

Read More

Perversion Therapy

Are straight US men being turned gay through so-called ‘Perversion Therapy’? Notorious tabloid claims liberal conspiracy to boost number of homosexuals in order for US to meet UN mandated minorities quotas. Claims condemned as right wing propaganda intended to distract from ‘Conversion Therapy’ scandal.

Read More

Too Good for the Poor

Is poverty too good for the poor? Extraordinary claims of well off City-types who engage in poverty role play. Buying up slums to revel in supposedly stress free, irresponsible lives of the poor, in order to relieve the ennui of their privileged lives.

Read More

Conspiracy of Conspiracy Theories

Are conspiracy theories themselves part of a conspiracy to subvert democratic institutions and national economies for the benefit of a shadowy elite? New book makes astounding claims that most popular conspiracy theories are being disseminated by sinister figures hoping to profit from the uncertainty and chaos they cause.

Read More

Bent Out of Shape

Home Secretary unveils Uri Gellar as new weapon against knife crime – promises future stabbings will be foiled as noted psychic causes offending blades to be bent out of shape before they can do any damage. Calls for initiative to be extended to sex crimes, with offending members withered before they can penetrate victims.

Read More

The Tories’ Last Orgy

Is the Tory party about to implode into an orgy of sadism and sexual depravity? Top political activist compares state of Tory government to last days of Third Reich, predicts it will self-destruct in hedonistic frenzy of sex and violence.

Read More

Calling Call My Bluff’s Bluff

Was genteel and pseudo-intellectual British TV game show Call My Bluff actually an instrument of government oppression?
Top conspiracy theorist claims show part of establishment conspiracy to subvert English language, thereby redefining the way we view certain issues.

Read More

Send Them Home!

‘Send them home!’ In wake of New Zealand mosque terror shootings, Maori leaders call for European immigrants to go home. Sentiments echoed by Australian Aboriginals and Native Americans as all call for end to mass white immigration. Native Americans propose wall around US to keep out white hordes.

Read More

Disability Wars

Investigation into Stephen Hawking’s former nurse uncovers underground network of gladiatorial contests for the disabled. Did late physicist’s use of high tech weaponry to win competition lead to Far Eastern gambling syndicate ‘offing’ him?

Read More

Worst Defence

Were Defence Secretary Gavin Williamson’s latest policy initiatives inspired by watching children’s TV? Worst Defence Secretary ever’s plans for moonbase and interceptors to combat future alien threat allegedly ripped off from Gerry Anderson TV shows.

Read More

Below the Belt

Is Jeff Bezos’ penis about to bring down Trump? Amazon boss calls Trump-supporting tabloid’s bluff, daring them to publish illicitly obtained ‘below the belt’ photos of the billionaire. Does ‘smoking wang’ point toward President?

Read More

Bum’s Rush

Fears that post-Brexit toilet paper shortages could lead to civil unrest. Government prepares plans for rationing (two sheets per dump) and martial law, while citizens explore potentially hazardous alternatives including newspaper and scouring pads.

Read More

Shoot ‘Em in the Commons

House of Commons in chaos as Corbyn’s ‘Zombie Government’ comment results in opposition MP firing shotgun at government benches, shouting ‘shoot ’em in the head!’ Rival parliamentary factions ‘tool up’ as Brexit debate turns violent!

Read More

Ghosts of Brexit

Desperate Theresa May claims Brexit deal rejected by Parliament actually drawn up by ghost of Margaret Thatcher. Prime Minister allegedly possessed by spirit of predecessor determined to pursue her Euroceptic agenda from beyond the grave. Cynical attempt to avert blame for humiliating defeat or inspired attempt to rally right-wing support for deal by accediting it to conservative icon?

Read More
Loading
Real Time Web Analytics