Top political scientist claims new formula will allow left to get in touch with ‘inner nastiness’ to better fight the Tories, the so called ‘Nasty Party’. Claims credit for Labour leader’s recent fiery conference speech amid fears that his potion could turn Keir Starmer into top-hatted, cape wearing murderous evil alter ego who beats poor children to death with cane.
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As Labour moves ahead in polls, Corbyn supporters complain complain new popularity is for ‘wrong reasons’. Argue party should be winning because it is more ‘virtuous’ than Tories and has ‘ideologically sound’ socialist policies rather than simply because Boris Johnson is big fat party animal. Party should pursue ideological purity rather than power.
Read MoreIs Labour planning to, literally, take Britain back to the seventies? Journalist claims manifesto promises compulsory strikes, radio prog rock quotas and peadophile children’s TV presenters. Austin Allegro and Hillman to be put back in production and digital TV scrapped in favour of traditional three channel TV.
Read MoreAre senior Labour party figures secretly planning to replace Jeremy Corbyn and Tom Watson with robots? Leadership ‘upgrade’ seen as essential after trials show mechanical leadership more charismatic and popular with voters.
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Corbyn unveils plans to combat British vegetable famine, whilst government denies plans for rationing and powdered vegetables. Greens welcome proposals to turn whole UK into giant market garden.
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Jeremy Corbyn to enter ‘Britain’s Got Talent’ as part of new media strategy. Advisers believe Labour Leader’s musical fruit act will demonstrate his populist appeal.
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Is Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn actually a deep cover Tory mole on a mission to destroy the party from within? Academic makes sensational claims that supposed left winger is actually trying to alienate voters to ensure Tory hegemony.
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Does Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn possess divine powers? Supporters tell of Corbyn’s seemingly miraculous ability to defeat government without winning Commons votes. Socialist Messiah or useless crackpot?
Read MoreDid Her Majesty The Queen lead English football hooligans against Russian thugs at Euro 2016? Extraordinary allegations as top hooligan claims armour clad Jeremy Corbyn rallied English hooligans in Marseilles.
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Political Storm Over Tabloid Claims About Corbyn’s ‘Disrespectful’ Pose in Labour Nude Charity Calender. Party Denies Allegations of Leader Using Poppy to Cover Privates in November Picture.
Read MoreGovernment Rocked by Witchcraft Allegations After Cameron Accused of Using Black Magic to Influence Scottish Independence Referendum! Claims that British Politics Rife with Witches!
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Is Labour Leadership Under Telepathic Attack From David Cameron? Miliband and Balls Don Tinfoil Hats for Defence Amidst Claims that Recent Policy Statements Result of Tory Mind Control Offensive!
Read MorePrime Minister’s Question Time to go Showbiz in Deputy PM Nick Clegg’s Proposals for Constitutional Overhaul. Lib Dem Leader Claims He Wants to Make Politics more Relevant to Britain’s Youth. Critics Accuse Main Parties of ‘Dumbing Down’ Political Process.
Read MoreIs Miliband Brothers’ Rivalry down to Childhood Argument Over Star Trek? Journalist denies trivialising Political Debate by trying to pass off inconsequential tittle-tattle about David and Ed Miliband as political analysis!
Read MoreWas Nick Clegg Seduced by Smooth Old Etonian Charms of David Cameron? Speculation Runs Wild After Liberal Democrat Leader Spurns Advances of ‘Rough Trade’ Gordon Brown to Form ‘Long Term Relationship’ With Cameron After Being Wined and Dined by Tory Leader!
Read MoreTop Tory Believes Cameron Just a Figment of His Imagination! Blair Converts to Socialism! Are Britain’s Leading Politicians Cracking Up Under Pressures of Electioneering?
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