Tag: tory satire

Save the Children

Britain’s peadophiles complain that too many unaccompanied refugee children arriving in UK are actually adults. Demand tougher age tests to ensure that the government only save the children for them, not over age impostors.

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For Queen and Country

Did Her Majesty The Queen lead English football hooligans against Russian thugs at Euro 2016? Extraordinary allegations as top hooligan claims armour clad Jeremy Corbyn rallied English hooligans in Marseilles.

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Bugger Boris

Is Boris Johnson the notorious Balham Buggerer? Top paranormal investigator claims Boris’ inner Turk unleashed under stress as he regresses into Turkish great grandfather to commit depravities.

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Full English Coup

Does ‘Leave’ Campaign Have Contingency Plans to Launch Military Coup in Event of ‘Remain’ Victory in EU Referendum? Sensational Claims that Farage and Other Brexit Leaders Plotting to Seize Power!

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Boris Goes Ape

Boris Johnson shot by police after manhandling child who climbed on his podium during Brexit campaign. Was former Mayor trying to protect child or had he gone ape?

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Boris: Top Trumper?

Is Boris Johnson the ‘Top Trumper’ Behind Super Injunction to Gag Reporting of Explosive Farting? Neighbours of Unnamed Top Politician Tell of How His Early Morning Wind Breaking is Destroying Their Lives!

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Three Line Whip

As ‘Whip and Tell’ stories involving government ministers proliferate, Tory back bencher launches private members bill proposing new code of conduct for sex workers involved with politicians.

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Diversionary Tactics

Are Recent Sex Scandals Really Diversionary Tactics Designed to Misdirect Public Attention Away From Prime Minister’s Tax Problems? Journalist Claims Secret Spin Doctor Masterminding HIgh Profile Events and News Stories to Divert Attention From Government’s Real Problems.

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Ban the Bounce!

Tory MP Calls for Ban on Bouncy Castles Following Series of Fatalities. Are Deadly Inflatables Alien Predators Preying on Human Children, or Terrorist Plot to Kill British KIds?

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Blue Heaven

Is Tory Government Siphoning Off Public Funds in Guise of Spending Cuts to Build Space Station Haven? ‘Blue Heaven’ Project to Provide Top Tories with Luxury Refuge After Trashing UK.

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Conspicuous Consumption

Chancellor Plans to Boost UK Manufacturing by Forcing Poor to Literally Consume Goods. Scheme to ‘Eat Deficit’ by Conspicuous Consumption Condemned by Economists and Medics Alike.

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Corbyn’s Coven

Is Labour Leader Jeremy Corbyn High Priest of a Powerful Witches’ Coven? Astonishing Claims From Tory Back Bencher Who Alleges that Corbyn Plans to Destroy Britain Through Black Magic.

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Kill the Poor

Does David Cameron’s ‘Assault on Poverty’ Herald the Violent Elimination of Britain’s Poor? Top Anti-Poverty Campaigner Claims Tories Planning Mass Murder of Benefits Claimants in Order to Eliminate Poverty.

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Going Nuclear

Government announces plans to deploy UK’s nuclear deterrent against Islamic extremists with nuclear strike on Birmingham. Migrants and Scots Nationalists also identified as threats to UK security and targeted with nuclear missiles.

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Animal Passions

Following ‘Pig Gate’, more animals come forward to claim sexual abuse at hands of senior Tories. Allegations that high level bestiality ring centered on South London city farm suppressed RSPCA investigations.

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Frozen Assets

Tory scheme to cryogenically freeze long-term unemployed to save of benefits payments exposed! Government plans to thaw out frozen assets as required by state of economy!

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