They Saved Diana’s Brain
Did surgeons save Princess Diana’s brain on night of fatal Paris car crash? New documentary film makes extraordinary claim that Diana’s brain still lives and exerts telepathic influence over her family!
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Tag: weird
I Let My House to a Serial Killer
‘I let my house to a serial killer!’ complains Airbnb customer. Users of Airbnb and similar services share tales of how their properties were used as porn movie sets and temporary brothels!
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Never Say Di
Former Royal medium reveals Princess Diana’s sensational post-mortem affairs. TV station condemned for airing recordings of seances in which Lady Di chronicles afterlife assignations with Errol Flynn and John Lennon.
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Secrets of the Shed
Anger as ‘Sex Dungeon Shed’ disqualified from local heat of ‘Shed of the Year’ contest. Investigation uncovers secrets of Britain’s garden sheds as private prisons and sleazy photographic studios exposed as successful entrants in competition.
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Modern Conspiracies Are Rubbish!
Are modern conspiracy theories rubbish? Startling claims from top conspiracy theorists that recent conspiracies such as Manchester bombing and Kensington fire have been poorly conceived and ineptly carried out. Call for return to classic conspiracies involving Aliens, Nazis and replicants.
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Faking Terror
Were London Bridge attackers actually part of Jihadi terror re-enactment group? Bizarre tabloid claims that whole terror incident a tragic misunderstanding with make believe terrorists armed with fake suicide bomb belts and rubber knives mistaken by police for real thing.
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In Sickness and in Health?
Are serious diseases like cancer a medical scam? Astonishing claims from Tory politician that most sicknesses invented by medics to justify existence of National Health Service and swindle billions of ponds of tax payers money to fund bogus treatments for fake diseases!
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Fire Down Below
Paranormal Investigator, Exorcist and Agony Aunt The Reverend Leonard Fanny advises readers on their supernatural problems. This time, a reader fears ‘fire down below’ during sex thanks to her pyrokinetic powers. Can the Rev help?
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Zombie Justice
Should convicted criminals who die before they’ve completed their sentences be brought back from the grave to finish their punishment? Newspaper suggests voodoo be employed to bring back as zombies offenders attempting to cheat justice through death.
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Down With Xmas!
Man Punches Out Salvation Army Officer for Wishing Him an Unsolicited ‘Happy Christmas’. So Called ‘Man Who Hate Christmas’ Plans to Sabotage Yuletide by Poisoning Supermarket Seasonal Foodstuffs with own Excrement.
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Invisible Trump
Is Donald Trump’s bid for the White House being sabotaged by an invisible man? Incredible claims that invisible saboteur real culprit behind groping allegations!
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Medical Magic
Government plans to break junior doctors’ dispute by using blackleg alternative medical practitioners, including voodoo priests, spiritualists and shamans, revealed. Patients complain of use of animal sacrifices instead of pharmaceuticals.
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No Sex Please!
Man banned from having sexual intercourse without giving police forty eight hours notice. Authorities claim his orgasms so powerful they induce frenzied sexual activity in anyone in close proximity.
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Winds of Terror
Police Accused of Overreacting After Massive Evil-Smelling Fart Sparks London Terror Alert. Flatulence Subsequently Deemed ‘Spontaneous’ Rather than Being Deliberate Chemical Attack.
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