Tag: cameron satire

Diversionary Tactics

Are Recent Sex Scandals Really Diversionary Tactics Designed to Misdirect Public Attention Away From Prime Minister’s Tax Problems? Journalist Claims Secret Spin Doctor Masterminding HIgh Profile Events and News Stories to Divert Attention From Government’s Real Problems.

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Kill the Poor

Does David Cameron’s ‘Assault on Poverty’ Herald the Violent Elimination of Britain’s Poor? Top Anti-Poverty Campaigner Claims Tories Planning Mass Murder of Benefits Claimants in Order to Eliminate Poverty.

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Animal Passions

Following ‘Pig Gate’, more animals come forward to claim sexual abuse at hands of senior Tories. Allegations that high level bestiality ring centered on South London city farm suppressed RSPCA investigations.

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Save Our Smut

Is internet porn the new front line in the battle for press freedom? Campaigners urge web users to download more filth from the net to frustrate Tory plans to restrict access to on lime pornography!

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Machine Politics

Are Britain’s Political Leaders Robots Dedicated to Destruction of Mankind? Top Tech Writer Claims Machine Politics of Tories Dehumanising Population in Readiness for Total Robot Takeover!

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Peado Finder General

Seventies Children’s TV Stars Terrorised by Peado Finder General. Government Denies New Anti-Child Abuse Initiative is Publicity Stunt Masquerading as Policy.

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Parliamentary Nudes

Government in Disarray as Stolen Nude Photos of Top Tory Ministers Released Online! Identity of Hackers Behind Naked Tory Scandal a Mystery – Muslim Extremists Suspected!

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Better Together?

Has Government Deliberately Sabotaged ‘Better Together’ Campaign? Allegations of Plans for Mass Deportations of Scots in England Following ‘Yes’ Vote to Create Jobs for the English, Cut Welfare and Reduce Crime!

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Raining Badgers

Is the flooding of the Somerset Levels the consequence of a botched attempt by the Department of the Environment to cull badgers in the West Country? Government responds to allegations by claiming floods are retaliation by angry badgers for earlier cull attempts!

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Tuned In, Turned On

What TV Turns You On? New Academic Study Reveals The Programmes and Stars Most Likely to Get Viewers’ Watching With Their Trousers Down!

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Dirty Bomb

Cameron Plans Surgical Missile Strike Against Syrian Porn Industry! Prime Minister Claims Damascus-Based Servers Beaming Internet Porn ‘Dirty Bomb’ into UK Homes!

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Suffer the Children

Has UK Government Deployed Army of Convicted Child Sex Offenders, Led by Gary Glitter, to Fight Alien Invaders Disguised as Children? Incredible Claims as Prime Minister Forced to Recall Parliament in Face of Lurid Tabloid Headlines!

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Head of State

Did David Cameron Use Severed Head of Lady Thatcher to Try and Turn Opponents to Stone? Downing Street Angrily Dismisses Bizarre Claims that Tories Plan Disembodied Head Worshipping ‘Cult of Thatcher’!

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Outfoxing Boris

Call for Cull of Boris Johnson Following Claims that London Mayor has Bitten Off Child’s Finger in Nocturnal Attack! Mayor’s Office Denies Reports, Blames Urban Foxes for Plot Against Boris!

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Invaders From Downing Street

Is UK Government Planning to Launch Fake Alien Invasion at Olympic Opening Ceremony? Leading Conspiracy Theorist Claims Extra-Terrestrial Attack is Chancellor’s ‘Plan B’ For Stimulating Economy!

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Out of Their Minds

Is Labour Leadership Under Telepathic Attack From David Cameron? Miliband and Balls Don Tinfoil Hats for Defence Amidst Claims that Recent Policy Statements Result of Tory Mind Control Offensive!

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